This article is going to begin with a confession and end with a challenge.
"And Nathan said to David, Thou art the man." 2 Samuel 12:7 (KJV)
There are areas in my Christian life where I do very well. Witnessing, sharing the gospel with the lost and prodigal both through this website and on the streets, fulfilling the Great Commission are all some of the gifts that the Lord has given me and I exercise them often. I love to tell people about Jesus. I am not a pastor, I have no church, am not part of the clergy. I am just a beggar telling other beggars
where the Bread is.
But sadly, however, there are two areas in my life where I do not do well. Everyone has besetting sins, but they don't usually like to talk about them. No one enjoys discussing their failures. But if anything I can share will help another brother or sister who is struggling, and God can get the glory from it, then good. And maybe it will help me too in the process.
My two main sin hotspots are sexual temptation and alcohol. I have done better with conquering alcohol than I have with resisting sexual temptation, but not by much. I will go for years at a time with never even one sip of alcohol, but invariably, a moment will arise even after years where I again find myself with a beer in my hand. Conviction sets in and the process of cleaning up starts again. Before I was saved I never had the desire to quit drinking, and since I have been saved it's been a struggle. I may not get the permanent victory here in the life, but I know I will in the life to come in Heaven with the Lord. How I long for that Day!
Sexually, I have been a mess since I was about 10 years old. It was an important year for me for two reasons. Its the age where I was introduced to "girlie magazines", pornography, and it's also the age where I was sexually assaulted by my closet homosexual piano teacher. Even just typing to words still brings tears to my eyes even after all this time. How well I can still feel his hot breath on shoulder, and his peculiar "old man" smell as each week he would slide his hands down into my pants. Anymore than that is none of your business, but I think that's enough to get the idea. After a few weeks of this, I told my mom I "just didn't feel like taking piano lessons anymore", and she mercifully allowed me to quit. But the scars remained, and do remain till this day. Some of the closest people to me in my life have not heard this about me until just now, and my prayer is that it will help just one other person to step out of the shadows, plead the Blood, and get clean.
As my life progressed, sexual impurity was a constant companion. The world sees nothing wrong with this type of behavior, and in fact, applauds it and rewards it. Kim Kardashian became a multimillionaire after releasing a video of her having sex. Fornication. Sex sells just about everything we look at in magazines, on television, in the movies, and at the ball game. It's anywhere and everywhere.
I got saved in 1990, and for the first time in my life I experienced what true forgiveness was all about. And for the first time since high school, I became sober and stopped fornicating. But the hooks that were put in at such a young age would not be removed so easily, and the struggle began. It is a struggle that endures now 25 years after receiving the Lord Jesus Christ as my Saviour. The Apostle Paul says this:
"For that which I do I allow not: for what I would, that do I not; but what I hate, that do I. For I know that in me (that is, in my flesh,) dwelleth no good thing: for to will is present with me; but how to perform that which is good I find not." Romans 7:15,18 (KJV)
The Bible is well aware of our struggle against sin, and acknowledges that it is no easy battle. When a person gets saved, sometimes the Lord just removes a certain sin from our life like it was never there. And other times, He for whatever His reasons are, will allow us to struggle with something because He knows it's for our good and for His glory. I will not pretend to know why God does a lot of the things He does, I just know He is always right, always fair, and always merciful to all those who call upon His Name.
Today in 2015, I have come face to face with the reality that I have failed when it comes to the biblical command of sexual purity. And it grieves me to the point where the Lord has laid upon my heart to write this article. I have fornicated when the Bible has told me not to. I have sent and received sexually impure text and picture messages when the Bible has told me not, and you know what? I am sick and tired of not getting the victory promised me as a Blood-washed Christian. I refuse to live like this one day longer. Like Jacob, I am wrestling with the Lord and will not quit until He gives me the blessing I am asking Him for. The trash is going to the curb.
Now how about you? I said that this article would end with a challenge, and here it is. Over the past 6 years, so many Christians have written to me and shared their struggles with me. I have been given first-hand accounts of women who cheated on the their husbands, and husbands who strayed from their wives. I personally know women who have struggles with lesbian temptations and men who are desperately fighting a same-sex attraction because the Bible calls it sin. I know some bitter, hardened people who are being eaten alive by the sin of pride. Every single of them born again, saved Christians.
I think one reason why there is so much struggle and so little victory is because we surround ourselves with temptation. If I right now deleted every account profile of my Facebook friends of women who have "boob shots" and bikini pics, my friend count would drop about 10-15% immediately. I have about 5,000 friends, you do the math. Nearly every television show includes references and visualizations of fornication, and yet we watch them anyway. Turn on your favorite football game, and the barely-dressed cheerleaders are shown every couple of minutes over a three hour period. Our society is saturated with it.
"Being confident of this very thing, that he which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ:" Philippians 1:6 (KJV)
Society is never going to change, in fact, Bible prophecy says it will only get worse
the closer we get to the Rapture. I believe that that Day is almost here, and I know I can do better as a Christian living pure for the Lord. God's word promises me that I can. So today, I challenge you to join me in cleaning up the filth in our lives. Open up your phone, and delete everything that Jesus would not approve of. Go through your social media accounts and remove profiles that only serve to tempt and lead you astray. Some of the greatest boxing matches of all time were won by efforts in the 15th round when the fight was almost over. This is no different.
Has someone wronged you? The Bible says to forgive them. Do you know a fallen brother or sister? The Bible commands us to help them back up again. Paul says this about that very thing:
"Brethren, if a man be overtaken in a fault, ye which are spiritual, restore such an one in the spirit of meekness; considering thyself, lest thou also be tempted."Galatians 6:1 (KJV)
If we are honest, the command to restore a fallen brother or sister is equally as hard to do as living sexually pure and sober lives. One of our greatest weaknesses as Christians is that we stink at forgiving others. Are you living a completely victorious-over-sin life today? Great! Now go out and help someone who needs help lifting themselves out of the mud of sin. But if you are honest, there are things in your spiritual closet that need to be thrown out in the trash. I received emails just this week from some brothers and sisters in Christ who are struggling with sin, losing the battle and asked me for prayer. I did pray for them, and then went the extra mile. I decided to write about my struggles and my failures in the hopes that I will get the victory, and that others will too in their own lives.
I have recently been on my face before God, confessing my sins and asking for forgiveness for the thoughts that are in my head, and for some of the junk that comes out of my mouth. I am not a sexually pure person, not since the age of 10, but that's going to change. I am counting on the same God that forgave King David to do the same for me, and to give me the same victory. And I just did something that I have never done before in my life. With tears in my eyes, I prayed and forgave my piano teacher, hoping that he was saved before he died. And hard as it was to do, really hard, I truly meant it.
"They say unto him, Master, this woman was taken in adultery, in the very act. Now Moses in the law commanded us, that such should be stoned: but what sayest thou? So when they continued asking him, he lifted up himself, and said unto them, He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her." John 8:4,5,7 (KJV)
Who do you need to forgive today? I think that the worst, hardest-to-fight sin of them all is pride. Maybe that's why the Lord lets us struggle, to learn how to be humble and to understand that we are no better than anyone else. Don't hate a brother or sister who sins different than you. All sin is equal, it's pride that tells you otherwise. Maybe if we truly started doing what Jesus would do, the Church could be a spiritual powerhouse which, sadly, it is not. I think one reason is because of our lack of forgiveness of others. That festers like a cancer inside us, causing nothing but bitterness. Let the shed Blood of Jesus Christ wash it away from you today.
The war is real, the battle is hot and the time is short. To the fight!
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